Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I’m a huge fan of yours. As my friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you’re even around at the holidays, hidden inside chocolates, as you warm us when we’re stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. However, lately I’ve been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise consequences:

1. Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important, I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex-boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

 2. Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that I eat a taco with chili sauce, along with a big Italian meatball and some stale chips (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Kat after a few cheese curls & chili cheese fries)? I’m an eclectic eater, but I think you went too far this time.

 3. Clumsiness: Unless you’re subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It’s completely unnecessary, and the black & blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.

 4. Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous. I know a little penance for our previous evening’s debauchery may be in order, but the 3 PM hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water, vitamin B, bread products, aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities.

 Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You’ve been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don’t know what to do with the extra money in my pockets. In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Thursday 3 PM (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

 Thank you,

Your biggest fan

P.S. THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

 1. Innovative

2. Preliminary

3. Proliferation

4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

 1. Specificity

2. British Constitution

3. Passive-aggressive disorder

 THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:

 1. Thanks, but I don’t want to have sex.

2. Nope, no more beer for me.

3. Sorry, but you’re not really my type.

4. Good evening, officer. Isn’t it lovely out tonight?

5. Oh, I couldn’t. No one wants to hear me sing.

Ant Repellant: To keep ants out of the house, find where the ants are entering the house and sprinkle a “barrier” of cinnamon or any type of ground pepper to block their way. The spices are too hot for the ants to cross. Cucumber peels have the same effect.

 Bathroom Odors: Place an opened box of baking soda behind the toilet to absorb bathroom odors.

 Carpet Stains: Baby wipes are miracle workers on carpet stains: from motor oil to blood, they remove almost anything!

 Candle Holders: To prevent the wax from melting and sticking to the inside of a votive candle holder, pour a bit of water in the holder, then place the candle on top. If you forgot the water, and there is wax stuck to your candle holder, pop it in the freezer for an hour. The wax will chip right off.

 Candle Wax: To remove wax from carpeting or other fabric, first scrape away any excess. Then, place a brown paper bag over the wax and run a warm iron over the bag. The wax will melt right into the bag! Continue moving the bag around as you pick up the wax so you are always using a clean section. If a little grease stain remains on carpet, sprinkle with baking soda and allow to sit overnight before vacuuming, which will remove the grease residue. If colored wax leaves a stain on carpet, blot with spot remover or carpet cleaner, following label directions.

 Cast Iron Pans: To gently and effectively clean your cast iron skillets after most uses, wipe out excess food with a dry paper towel, then sprinkle salt inside the pan. Wipe clean with a clean, dry paper towel. The salt acts as an abrasive to scratch off any stuck-on particles of food without using soap and water, which can remove your seasoning. For stubborn stuck-on food, use a putty knife to scrape it off. You may, however, need to re-season the pan after doing this.

 Chimney: To keep your chimney clean, throw a handful of salt on the fire.

 Chrome: To remove rust from chrome, wipe it with aluminum foil dipped in Coke®. To polish chrome, use a crumbled up piece of aluminum foil and rub.

 Cloudy Drinking Glasses: Soak them for an hour or longer in slightly warm white vinegar. Then, use a nylon-net or plastic dish scrubber to remove film. Still there? The damage must be etching (tiny scratches that occur in the dishwasher) and is permanent, sorry to say. To avoid this altogether, hand-wash your best glasses.

 Coffee Grinder: Grind up a cup or so of rice in a coffee grinder to clean the grinder and sharpen its blades.

 Copper: To polish copper, rub an ample amount of catsup on the copper and let it stand for 5 minutes. Rinse off the catsup with hot water and dry to find an incredible shine. Crayon on Walls or Washable Wallpaper: Spray with WD-40®, then gently wipe, using a paper towel or clean cloth. If the mark is stubborn, sprinkle a little baking soda on a damp sponge and gently rub in a circular motion. If the WD-40® leaves a residue, gently wipe off with a sponge soaked in soapy water; rinse clean; blot dry. Another method is to use a hair dryer - it heats the wax and wipes away instantly. If the color remains, like red usually does, wet a cloth with bleach and wipe.

As the days get longer and the temperatures climb higher, it’s especially important for us to avoid heat-related problems that can adversely affect our health.

Along with children and the chronically ill, seniors run the highest risk of overheating. To help protect yourself from overheating, remember to drink plenty of cool (but not icy cold) liquids, primarily water, especially when you are physically active.

If you are exposed to extreme heat for more than an hour, you must also replenish lost salt and minerals, so look for healthy, replenishing choices such as juices and sports drinks. Be sure to avoid caffeine, alcohol, and sugar, as they cause dehydration.

Avoid sunburns and the long-term risk of skin cancer by wearing lightweight, light-colored, loose-fitting clothing. Wear a wide-brimmed hat and use a sunscreen of at least an SPF of 30 that is a broad spectrum.

Pace yourself and be aware of the common signs and symptoms of heat illnesses:

* Persistently rapid heart beat

* Red, hot, dry skin or loss of the ability to perspire

* Throbbing headache

* Dizziness

* Confusion

* Weakness

* Muscle cramps

If you experience any of the above:

* Stop what you are doing

* Increase your fluid intake

* Move to a place to cool off, either in the shade, near a fan, or to an air-conditioned vehicle or room (if you’re unable to move to an air-conditioned area, cool off with a damp towel, sponge or douse yourself with water)

If you begin feeling better, you should wait several hours before resuming normal activities. If you do not start to improve after 30 minutes, seek medical treatment. If you experience or witness an episode of fainting, call for emergency treatment and transport.

You can use these dough recipes to roll out and cut shapes with cookie cutters or create your own sculptures.

Kool-Aid Dough

1 cup flour

1 Cup warm water

2 teaspoons cream of tartar

1 teaspoon oil

1/4 cup salt

1 Package un-sweetened Kool-Aid for each color you desire

Play Dough

1 cup flour

2 teaspoons cream of tartar

1 cup warm water

1 teaspoon oil

1/4 cup salt

food coloring

Mix all ingredients, adding Kool-Aid or food coloring last. Stir over medium heat until smooth about 3 to 5 minutes. When mixture forms a ball in pot, remove from pot and knead until blended smooth. Let cool. Can be kept in airtight container until ready to use.

Cinnamon Play Dough

1 cup cinnamon

1 tablespoon nutmeg

1 tablespoon cloves

2 tablespoons white glue (Elmer’s type school glue)

3/4 cup applesauce (Let drain in a strainer for several hours)

1 Straw for making hole to hang ornament

 Mix cinnamon, cloves & nutmeg. Add applesauce & glue. Work mixture with hands until smooth and well mixed. Roll out to 1/4 inch thickness. Cut with cookie cutters. Don’t forget to create a hole for hanging, using the straw.

Put on wire rack to dry at room temp for several days. Turn twice daily so they don’t curl up around the edges!

Use ribbon to hang when completely dry.

 Edible PlayDough

1 cup peanut butter

1 cup honey

2 cups powdered milk

 Mix all the ingredients in a bowl. Add more powdered milk to make dough more workable, if needed.

This dough is great for little ones who put everything into their mouths. Form the dough into holiday shapes or roll out and cut with cookie cutters. Kids can eat immediately or keep to hang on a tree. These are great if older kids have smaller brothers and sisters too!

Place rocks in a bowl or dish to scent a room. A nice, neat, and attractive alternative to potpourri! Color or paint them as realistically or outrageously as you wish. A great handmade gift for friends and family as well as a crafty activity to share with your kids.

 1/2 cup plain flour

1/2 cup salt

1/4 teaspoon essential oil(s)

2/3 cups boiling water

Food coloring, if desired 

Mix dry ingredients in a bowl until well blended. Add essential oil (any single oil or blend of oils as long as the total amount does not exceed the 1/4 teaspoon called for in the recipe), and boiling water to dry ingredients. (Scent will be strong, but will fade slightly when dry.)

 Separate the mixture into sections if you want to make different colored rocks. To color stones, blend in food coloring, one drop at a time until desired shade is reached. Form balls into different shape and sizes to look like stones. Allow the scented rocks to dry for a minimum of three days, making sure to turn them several times a day. Enjoy

Tips:

Substitute a small quantity of your favorite perfume for the essential oil.

Adult supervision is recommended. Gloves are also recommended, as essential oils and fragrances may be irritating to the skin. Some essential oils can be toxic so do your research and take precautions.

For faster drying keep the scented rocks under a fan.

You can also shape the dough mixture into logs, or any other shape you like. We like to make animal shapes, or use cookie cutters on rolled out dough to make scented ornaments.

I have been having major technical difficulties. Two weeks ago, my computer suffered a complete meltdown. I was hoping for a simple software fix, but that was not to be. After I installed a new OS (operating system) and updating drivers, I still could not access the internet.

Then I replaced the modem and cables, did the drivers thing again, and still no internet. After going over everything with my ISP’s (Internet Service Provider) tech support guy we had it narrowed down to an internal hardware problem.

I’m not all that knowledgeable about the internal working of a pc, so I called a friend to come check it out for me. Turns out that the ethernet and USB ports on my pc’s motherboard are fried, hence no connection to the modem and no internet.

I finally had the money to go pick up an ethernet card that plugs in to the motherboard. I have internet access again, yay!

The only downside? I lost about two years worth of saved emails, documents, bookmarks, and passwords.

Nothing like starting from scratch to make you appreciate backups. Wish I was disciplined enough to do it on a regular basis, maybe I wouldn’t be out two years worth of stuff.

Leathers from Fresh Fruit

Select ripe or slightly overripe fruit. Wash fresh fruit or berries in cool water. Remove peel, seeds, and stem. Cut fruit into chunks. Use 2 cups of fruit for each 13-inch by 15-inch fruit leather. Puree fruit until smooth. Add 2 teaspoons of lemon juice or 1/8 teaspoon ascorbic acid (375 mg.) for each 2 cups of light-colored fruit to prevent darkening.

If you choose to sweeten the leather, add corn syrup, honey, or sugar. Corn syrup or honey is best for longer storage because they do not crystallize. Sugar is fine for immediate use or short storage. Use 1 1/4 to 1 1/2 cups sugar, corn syrup, or honey for each 2 cups of fruit. Saccharin-based sweeteners could also be used to reduce tartness without adding calories. Aspartame sweeteners may lose sweetness during drying.

Leathers from Canned or Frozen Fruit

Home-preserved or store-bought canned or frozen fruit may also be used to make leathers. Drain fruit and save liquid. Use 1 pint of fruit for each 13-inch by 15-inch leather. Purse fruit until smooth–if too thick, add liquid. Add 2 teaspoons of lemon juice or 1/8 teaspoon ascorbic acid (375 mg.) for each 2 cups of light-colored fruit to prevent darkening. Applesauce can be dried alone or added to any fresh fruit purse as an extender. It decreases tartness and makes the leather smoother and more pliable.

Preparing the Trays

For drying in the oven, a 13-inch by 15-inch cookie pan with edges works well. Line pan with plastic wrap, being careful to smooth out wrinkles. Do not use waxed paper or aluminum foil.

To dry in a dehydrator, purchase specially designed plastic sheets or line plastic trays with plastic wrap.

Pouring the Leather

Fruit leathers can be poured into a single large sheet (13-inch by 15-inch) or into several smaller sizes pieces. Spread puree evenly. About 1/8-inch thick, onto drying tray. Avoid pouring purse too close to the edge of the cookie sheet. The larger fruit leathers take longer to dry. Approximate drying times are 6 to 8 hours in a dehydrator, up to 18 hours in an oven, and 1 to 2 days in the sun.

Drying the Leather

Dry fruit leathers at l40 degrees F. Leather dries from the outside edge toward the center. Test for dryness by touching center of leather, no indention should be evident. While warm, peel leather from plastic and roll. Then, allow the leather to cool and rewrap the roll in plastic.

Chances are the fruit leather won’t last long enough for storage. If it does, it will keep up to 1 month at room temperature. For storage up to 1 year, place tightly wrapped rolls in the freezer.

Preparing Food for Drying

Select ripe fruit for drying. Bruised fruit can be used if you trim away any bruised spots. Do not use molding food for drying.

Slicing foods allows the dry air to circulate and dry the surface area of the food first. Cut foods into 1/8-inch to 1/2-inch slices. The higher the water content, the larger you should make the slice size. Small slices of high-moisture foods, such as watermelon, would disappear when all the moisture has evaporated.

Be sure to peel fruits and vegetables, including bananas, melons, winter squash, and other tough-skinned foods.

Pretreatment

Pretreatments are techniques used to make quality products. Pretreatments include dipping, blanching, cooking, or candying.

Dipping prevents any oxidation or unattractive color changes in fruits and vegetables. Dip fruits in pineapple or orange juice. Dip vegetables in diluted bottled lemon juice (dilute a quarter of a cup of lemon juice with two cups water, then dip vegetables and some fruits for 2 to 3 minutes).

Commercial fresh fruit stabilizers can also be used (dilute one half of a Tablespoon of stabilizer with 2 cups water). Sodium sulfite is another commercial product for pre-treating foods. You may want to avoid this if you suffer sulfa allergies. If you want to make a homemade stabilizer, mix 1 Tablespoon of salt or vinegar with 8 cups of water or dissolve one 500 mg tablet of vitamin C per 1 cup of water.

Blanching is highly recommended for asparagus, green beans, broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cauliflower, and peas. Blanch for a very short period to cause checking of skins.

Drying is the oldest method of preserving food. Through- out history, the sun, the wind, and a smoky fire were used to remove water from fruits, meats, grains, and herbs.

By definition, food dehydration is the process of removing water from food by circulating hot air through it, which prohibits the growth of enzymes and bacteria.

Benefits of Dried Food

Dried foods are tasty, nutritious, lightweight, easy-to-prepare, and easy-to-store and use. The energy input is less than what is needed to freeze or can, and the storage space is minimal compared with that needed for canning jars and freezer containers.

The nutritional value of food is only minimally affected by drying. Vitamin A is retained during drying, however, because vitamin A is light sensitive, food containing it should be stored in dark places. Yellow and dark green vegetables, such as peppers, carrots, winter squash, and sweet potatoes, have high vitamin A content. Vitamin C is destroyed by exposure to heat, although pre-treating foods with lemon, orange, or pineapple juice increases vitamin C content.

Dried foods are high in fiber and carbohydrates and low in fat, making them healthy food choices. Dried foods that are not completely dried are susceptible to mold.

Microorganisms are effectively killed when the internal temperature of food reaches 145 degrees Fahrenheit (F).

Equipment Needed for Drying

To be certain of the final quality and consistent drying of foods, a dehydrator is recommended, especially with unpredictable Ohio weather. Sharp knives and a food processor or blender will also make the drying task easier.

Many guidelines call for blanching, steaming, or pre-treating foods. Equipment for these processes include a deep kettle with a lid and a wire basket, a colander, or an open mesh cloth bag to hold produce. A non-metal bowl is best for pre-treating fruits and vegetables to prevent discoloring.

more tomorrow…

Eye-drops may be a simple way of medicating the eye, but many patients have difficulty using them and don’t always get the right dose at the right time. Now a team from Cambridge, Massachusetts’ Eyenovations has developed contact lenses that can deliver drugs to the eye in measured doses for a month or longer. Their initial focus is on developing a lens to help glaucoma patients. They believe the technology can also be used to help other eye conditions and deliver antibiotics following surgery.

The team has developed the drug-dispensing technology using a hydro-gel lens with a polymer film inside, which contains the medication.

The lens gradually releases medication at a rate determined by the properties of both the lens and polymer film. This ensures patients with eye conditions requiring drops, especially those who struggle to follow a medication schedule, receive the right amount of medication at the right time.

Glaucoma affects about 2.5 million Americans each year and the numbers are growing. Treatment involves administering eye-drops up to eight times a day but, because patients often have few symptoms, especially in the early stages, many give up on their medication regime. A self-medicating lens could greatly help these people as well as the elderly, disabled, inhabitants of remote areas and others who find it difficult to stick with a regimented schedule.

The Eyenovations lens delivers high doses of medication for up to 100 days. The team – led by Daniel Kohane, director of the Laboratory for Biomaterials and Drug Delivery at the Children’s Hospital in Boston and Joseph Ciolino, a clinical fellow at Massachusetts Eye and Ear Infirmary – is working on commercial lenses using materials approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) that deliver drugs for up to 30 days, which is the FDA’s limit for single-use contact lenses.

The Eyenovations group has begun animal testing and plans clinical testing soon. To be clinically effective, the lenses will have to fit well, allow proper flow of oxygen to the eye, and not interfere with vision. For those who already wear contact lenses, it may be possible to create a medicated lens with vision correction.

On a personal note, my mother has glaucoma and is terrible at using her drops correctly. These lenses would be a huge help for her. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that Eyenovations’ testing goes well.