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How Much?

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A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon.  As she laid her pet on the table, the Vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s chest.

duck

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, “I’m sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away.”

The distressed woman wailed, “Are you sure?”

Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead,” replied the Vet. “How can you be so sure?” she protested.  ”I mean you haven’t done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.” The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room.

He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador retriever.  As the duck’s owner looked on in amazement as the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the Vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The Vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.

black_lab_500

A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

The Vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck.”

The Vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck’s owner, still in shock, took the bill. “$150!” she cried, “$150 just to tell me my duck is dead!”

vet-money

The Vet shrugged, “I’m sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the CAT scan, it’s now $150.”


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Moms Soapbox is a forum for all of the fantastically ridiculous issues that face Moms (and Dads) in today's world of information overload and endless checklists on how to be the perfect parent. My intention is to break some stereotypes about what a Mother should be and share with my readers the experiences I have had in raising my two teenage sons while trying to juggle graduate school, a house full of responsibilities and a desire to go with my gut when it comes to parenting. My hope is to show that you can be comfortable enough with yourself and your family to show the world that it isn't a competition but rather a journey to learn and laugh as much as possible

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